And the Winner Is. . .

I nominated myself for mother of the year and I also voted for myself. Since I was the only one involved in the process I also determined myself the unanimous winner. I'm having a hard time not being angry with myself although I know it is a fruitless waste of time--what's done is done. Last year at this time I debated and prayed and pondered about going back to teaching. Yes, it would just be part-time, but I truly loved being a stay home mom. After MANY, MANY tears, I started back to school in August. My main concern was what I could do if my children became ill. I'm not just talking a cold or the stomach flu, or whatever, I'm talking needing to miss school for days at a time. What are the chances of that, right? Well, apparently quite good in this family who is lately riddled with illness. In October I had to take 2 1/2 weeks off to deal with the blood clot in my lung. In March I had to take 2 weeks off to deal with the blood clot in my leg. Now, my little Hunter has mono and I have no more time to take off. Doug has been trying to go into work a little bit late so that Hunter doesn't have to be home alone as long, but THAT'S MY JOB! I'm the mom! I want to take care of my babies! I want to stay home and make sure they are getting enough fluids, resting, being safe. Well, I can't be right now and it is killing me. I know there was nothing I could do about the whole blood clot issue, but hey, I'm a woman, so I am experiencing tremendous guilt. It's okay though, that's just what I do! :-)